“I’m Hearing Voices” Blogfest Day 2: Dialogue Introduction

It’s day two of the Blogfest hosted over at Live to Write…Edit When Necessary and Reading, Writing, and Lovin’ It! Today’s challenge is:

“Dialogue Introduction: Have two characters introduce each other using only dialogue—no backstory, no internalization, just dialogue between the two. Max 250 words.

All I’m going to do to introduce this is tell you that I’m using “CROSS//” characters Danielle Cromwell and Miranda Hotler, because if you ask me to write an interaction scene, it has to be them. (Also, warning: they swear like the sailors they could be, but no slurs.)

If I showed you the actual “best screencap ever” of them, I would be spoiling everything.

“It appears that we have company.”
“Good. Maybe they can distract you from me.”
“How rude. I was merely keeping you company.”
“I never asked for your company. Hey, why aren’t you looking at me? What are they saying?”
“Hm? Oh, they were wondering if we could introduce each other.”
“Ha! You go on ahead, I need a drink first.”
“All right. Well, the one quaffing her beer here is Danielle.”
“It’s not even good beer, honestly.”
“She’s a bit stubborn. And insubordinate towards me.”
“Pfft. Like you deserve better.”
“Well, go on. It’s your turn now.”
“Eh? Hm. Well this one who is…smoking. Really? You have to smoke now?”
“It’s a free country, so says we in the military.”
“This one destroying my lungs with second-hand smoke is Miranda. If I’m insubordinate, then she’s insufferable.”
“You left out the part where I’m your commanding officer.”
“No, what I left out is the part where you’re always trying to conduct special ops. missions into the dark recesses of my pussy.”
“It’s true though! I’m telling you! Even though she’s my commanding officer, and I’ve already told her no, she still comes on to me like tigers onto meat.”
“Face it, Danielle, you only say no because I’m your commanding officer.”
“Fucking you would be unprofessional. And stop smiling.”
“Stop drinking.”
“Stop smoking!”
“See how she treats her commanding officer?”
“Go fuck yourself!”
“I would love to, but I’m afraid that would be rather, ah…unprofessional.”
“Fucking lesbians.”
“I always try.”
Once again, a perfect 250 words =P